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Thursday, July 07, 2005

Soccer Hooligans In Iraq Now!

I’m starting to get tired of how we are handling the war on terror. Let me explain in the context of the latest attacks against the Brits. I lived in England when the IRA were blowing up innocents in Ireland and England. What I remember most from that time is that Scotland Yard, MI5, MI6 had no compunction in pulling IRA murderers out of buildings knowing where they were, and putting them in jail, or killing them outright. Back then, the Brits took an eye for an eye, literally. With time, money and resources on the Queen’s side, eventually, the IRA went away. I am explaining away most of the other socio-economic factors that helped end the IRA’s grip on terror – industrialization, mass consumerism, etc., But in the end, the IRA ran out of bullets along with its popularity, not to mention that most of its apparatus was in jail, dead and it’s sympathizers here in the US and around the world gave up giving them money and favorable press.

Tomorrow, Blair needs to start taking London apart, building by building. Go into the Muslim ghettos and start pulling these murderers out of their mosques and send them back to the Middle East. That way, these pieces of camel dung can be killed by coalition forces once and for all.

I have a solution. Soccer Hooligans! The best weapon the Brits have besides their outstanding Special Ops units in their Marines or Army.

Now to make this work, you can’t get any fans from the Premiership Teams. Arsenal, Chelsea and Liverpool fans are not Hooligans, they are just too tame. Man U might come close, but their fans are still too pissed about the owner of the Bucs buying their team.

Blair is going to have to dig deep into the other Divisions. Millwall, Luton, Burnley, are the first teams to come to mind. How about this…Let’s get Celtic and Rangers’ fans together in Glasgow and broadcast over the loud speaker that Kenny Daglish was just murdered by Al Zarqauwi. Iraq would be cleaned up before the beginning of the second half! (I just thought of this – English Hooligans have more travel restrictions on them then Muslims coming in and out of England!)

On a more serious note, its time for Blair and Dubbya to do the following (sanitzed List):

- End immigration now
- Close the borders (US) with the National Guard on orders to hunt – no bag limit!
- Deport all Middle East and Muslim Far East college students
- Suspend all Work Visas immediately for anyone from the Mid-East
- Revoke the IRS exempt tax status on all Muslim organizations
- Any Professor of Mid-East origin who is not a US Citizen is immediately deported

How’s that for a start? Better yet, send in the Millwall Hooligans before the new season starts in August!

Soccer hooligans...brilliant!
Do you really think deporting all middle eastern people is the answer? I don't think it's very fair to say that all Muslim's are terrorists.
Sounds very racist.
Of course none of what I penned will happen. When you're at war, every possibility has to be considered. At a minimum, any undocumented person in this country should be thrown out. I still believe that any and all Professors and students who are not US Citizens should be sent home. That is not racism. The US needs to close it borders before what happens in the UK happens here!
That's a great plans. Maybe instead of deporting them we could just send them to 'camps'. No need to worry about what goes on there since this is "War" and they are the "Enemy". Then maybe we could all get snappy brown shirts and revel in our purity.
I think I missed the point, was this about how to create more or less terrorists.

I find the idea less than compelling that by becoming all the bad things they say we are somehow allows us to win.
Folks - it's a PARODY! The only thing I mean is to send Hooligans over to Iraq and let them stomp on the terrorists. Obviously, we can't do anything on that list. Even the legitimate stuff like closing the borders and sending all non US students packing won't happen since we would 'upset' too many people. This is a paradoy. Next time, I'll make it clear that I'm having fun! Thanks for your reply. I love this blogging stuff!
Yeah, sarcasm is sometimes lost over the ether of the Internet. Especially when it treads a little close to the serious rhetoric of a writer.

With the number of reactionaries online it's getting harder to tell what is crazy-serious and crazy-haha. Anyway, as someone who has lived surrounded by a lot of very pleasant and very pro american muslims who were attacked and marginalized for their beliefs I think its hard to find it funny.
The British government, at the time that the IRA was at it's height, also had no problems in arresting innocent men, withholding evidence and trying to put them in prison for life. (The Guildford Four, The Birmingham Six. Look them up. The stories might interest you.)

"With time, money and resources on the Queen’s side, eventually, the IRA went away."

The Queen does not pay for the British Government. The Queen is a ceremonial head of state and does not hold any power whatsoever.

It was my understanding that the IRA has not gone away but simply announced a ceasefire after quiet negotiations with the John Major Government. I am no fan of John Major or his Government, but the fact that they were willing to talk to the terrorists, which no Government before them were willing to do, saved hundreds of lives.

It's a problem, though. Turn a blind eye to a couple of murders and save hundreds of future murders? Difficult. I would not like to be a politician.
That is an interesting analysis Tom. Especially the point that peace was not acheived through violence but through negotiation. In both of these case violence seems to beget more violence. Not to say that there is never a time for war but it might be worth giving a closer look to the alternatives.

I think its important to also note the giant difference between US/Iraq and England/IRA. The IRA had actually attacked England and killed English civilians. I'm pretty sure that is a major distinction.
Boys...get overyourselves. It's a bloody PARODY! Of course the ruddy Queen has no power, mate, it's a reference to the Crown, the gvt, everything British! There is absolutely no way any gvt will be able to negotiate with the Taliban, Ossama. You guys want to try? Good Luck. Best to kill him and everyone who looks like him!
As far as your comment about the left and right loonies on the net. I could not agree more. Both on the left and the right, there are a lot of people who need therapy, a hug, a time-out...something! The anger and vitriol is staggering. I'm skipping the bits about most of the lunatic rants are unsubstantiated. yes, they can have an opinion. But if you're going to call Hillary a lesbian devil worshiper or name Mr Rove as the anti-Christ, well at least back it up with something...a dead body, tattoos on the scalp, etc. I agree with you about the mean folks. If I come across as mean, that is not the intent. Passion is not anger. I will work on that. Thanks!
Thanks, I don't even really think you're mean and I'm not trying to get all PC on you. It's just that to a lot of hard working, law abiding Muslims in this country the idea of being summarily deported is not funny and a very real threat. That's just why I personally think it's important to not let that kind of talk slide too much even if it is in jest.
Granted! I apologize. Being funny does not mean having to be mean. Thanks again for your interset in my ranting drivel. Do you have a blog? You should. You write pretty well.
No blog for me. I think I lack the time and attention span to make one as good as I would like. Thank you for your compliments. Despite the fact that I vehemently disagree with pretty much everything you write I appreciate your willingness to defend your opinions in comments.
Is that what others don't do...if I am bold enough to make my thoughts public, I need to defend what I write. It's a lot of fun. I appreciate someone taking the time to comment on my right/lunatic ramblings. Tons of fun! Thanks to all who post!
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