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Tuesday, December 13, 2005

A Conservative Wish List For Christmas

Dear Santa,

Although I think you’re a Democrat since all you do is give stuff that someone made to other people for nothing, I still think you’re neat and look great on a Coke can, which is the only place you should be seen in public. So here goes my wish list for this year:
Your Pal, CR.

Merry Christmas

All my ‘wish fors’ above make me what kind of conservative? Absolutely out of my mind? Good! Ideology be damned - all conservatives, no matter what stripe, tilt, bent should unite in the fight for some of the things in my wish list since it is these principles (save some of the sillier ones) plus the multifarious ones I have omitted, that the left attacks us with 24/7/365. NeoCon/PaleoCon. Phooey! When you look at the left and what it stands for, does it matter? Nope!


The Corporation for Public Broadcasting (NPR, PRI and others) receives $400 million from the feds. You're wanting to cut that BUT you're wanting to increase the military budget to $1 T-T-Trillion?!


I'm curious: Do you consider yourself a fiscal conservative? If so, by what definition?

Also, if boy/girl scout participation was mandatory, then I guess you'd also have to allow gays in the boy/girl scouts, or would it be mandatory for all but gays/lesbians?

By the way, this is a fun-to-read if totally insane otherwise list.
Thanks - I had fun putting this together...tons more to add, but this is a pretty good start. It's a parody, fun, musings, rants...I do wish that many of these things would be solved. But it ain't gonna be Santa Claus that does it. As for the Boy Scouts/Girl Scouts - admission is not based on sexual preference which, I hope, 99% of the children have no such inclinations. If they do have such leanings, or they are the less than 1% of children from such unions or single parent homes, then compulsory particiaption in Scouts could get them on the right track. If it offends, oh well. Majority Rules!
Well pick one wish and make it come true this year. BTW - I am in charge for Adopt-a-Platoon for my kids' school. It is important. Then again, I live in a state that supports the military! Aslo up for the military pay raise!
I am thinking that you were never in the military, is that correct ? If you were you must have forgotten that BURNING A FLAG IS THE ONLY PERMISSIBLE WAY of disposing of the flag of these UNITED STATES
Brother, I began burning flags in the Boy Scouts as you proscribed. Burning the flag in protest is the issue I raised. If you're going to respond, get it right!
Great list CR. Hope you and yours have a very Merry Christmas and happy, healthy and wishlist come true New Year.
Jeesh. Santa's gunna break his back trying to bring you all that..
Damm dude, U is all over the map on this one. Interesting list tho.
Your blog is appropriately titled!

Peace, Snoop
Although I usually only link to liberal blogs (just think of the old line, keep your friends close and enemies closer, LOL!) I am adding you to the list.
Yes I’m a little over the top on some things but I’m a hard core conservative. I love mixing it up with liberals. Makes it more fun!

Peace, Snoop
You made the list, Snoop. Come back any time! Merry Christmas!
My what a list! :)
Whoa! I just copied your list (or most of it...the Howard Stern wish was eliminated) and sent it via Priority Mail as my wish list to Santa.

Most excellent!

Merry Christmas!
I am astounded. 1, at how screwed we would all be if you got your wishes. and, 2, that I actually found four of them I can agree with:

“I wish for mandatory Second Language education at every grade, and you can’t chose to study a language you already speak

I wish for us to get out of Haiti/Korea

I wish for us to get out of Germany (take that for your help in the GWOT)

I wish for no women in combat, ever” (although I would add no men either)

I feel that there is hope you may yet see the light. Also, your list is probably the most anti Christian rant I have ever seen, bravo and Merry Christmas.
On the contrary, my list is quite Chritian. If I had my way, I would take us back to the time of cavorting Druids, death by stoning and the extension of slavery to anyone who does not have a Knighthood. And another thing...it's a parody! Get over yourself. Lighten-up (come on - the one about the Beatles is bloody hilarious) And out of all my 'wish fors', you did not agree with anything that limits the power of those that seek to control or do us harm (our Gvt, nut-case politicos, terrorists, illegals, the MSM, the ACLU, the NEA, Unions, un-American College Profs, etc.). Nor did you agree with rewarding our Military personnel that allow you to actually draw breath in this great nation and think your pacifist 'America is wrong' thoughts (Yes, I visited your site - some of it is pretty good, esp the bit about Rummy!)? How Christian is that? Coal for you, buddy! Wait, that's un-Christian, right? No it's not! Thanks for the visit and tell all your friends!
Yeah, yeah. Just keep your eyes on the road and your hands on the wheel.
And what a riposte that was! How novel to quote a dead beat no talent heroin addict in Msr. Morrison.
Had you thought about bringing back that grate law/custom that got lost over time known as the "Droit de Siegneur". Now there's a Christmas gift worth asking for.

Other than reinstituting his former rights, Poldark Maximus would wish for the liberal blogger community to develop a sense of humor, regain their ability to parody rather than eviscerate their political foes, and consider why we do this (blog) in the first place.
no prima nocta? no interest. laws and punishment, oh yeah!
There are simply too many of your empty-headed wishes here to disagree with! What a monstrous task it would be to tackle but a few of these misguided musings . . . I will say this. As an ex-neo-con , I understand how you feel (pats head). Now, I have one wish . . . that you spend at least one hour this year reading the Constitution, another hour concentrating upon the Bill of Rights, and many hours of contemplation upon how intellectually unjustifiable it is for you to support small government domestically and big government everywhere else. Think about it. But not too hard . . . we want you to take baby steps toward the realization that you cannot honestly claim to be "conservative". You are conservative in some areas, imperialist/socialist in others. When you and other so-called "conservatives" begin to appropriately label themselves, then we could have a more enlightened argument about the role of government in our lives.
Oh My God...lighten up, my pseudo intellectual commenter. It's a parody. 'Misguided musings' huh?...like up'ing the pay of the military, getting rid of the NEA, closing the border, never seeing John Lennon's mug again, teaching Smith/Drucker to children, putting God back in schools, crushing the msm and the ACLU...misguided? This list is Toqueville on stilts! Go back to your local four year diploma factory and split hairs with all the other poli-sci weenies. Jesus, if your comments are a true indication of your world-view on life, religion and politics, please don't vote or breed.
john ryan said...

I am thinking that you were never in the military, is that correct ? If you were you must have forgotten that BURNING A FLAG IS THE ONLY PERMISSIBLE WAY of disposing of the flag of these UNITED STATES

There's a huge difference between retiring a flag and dragging a burning one down the street underneith an ANSWER protest sign. I retired dozens of flags while in the Boy Scouts and it was done with the utmost respect and honor for each one burned. Each flag was displayed 1 last time for spectators, its history recited, and taps was played as we saluted and placed it into the fire. Contrast that with the hippy protester method.

Merry Late Christmas. I hope some of these come true for you C R Mountjoy! Not all but some.

John from XRW.
Yep... I still hold that you're not really a neocon, and (on several issues) hardly a conservative. Your wish list, however, is damned funny. Satire rocks my socks, man. Merry Christmas!!!


PS: I've figured it out. You're officially an Extremist Moderate. That's it: 'The Extremist Moderate Blogger'
Moderate...cavorting cruids, death by stoning and the extension of slavery to anyone who does not have a knighthood? That is moderate? Turning the clock of history to 1957 is not conservative? JHC - how much more right of center do you have to be for the things in this list? I got emails from a fella at the John Birch Society and he wanted to know if I was a member! I got another email from a Jesse Helms staffer that said he was going to show it to Jesse! Come on, man. This list is conservatism in spades. I'm not moderate about anything. I hate the left, liberals, the media, the NEA, ACLU, PBS, NPR, every democrat (local, state, fed), illegals, modern culture, lefty college proffs, John Lennon, the PLO, Disco, Mowtown, Castro, the French, I want the Patroit Act extended forever, compulsory military service, compulsory Shakespear/Business Ed, Marriage Amendment, the abolition of the ADA, ABA, punitive taxes, I want drilling in ANWR, I want to reinstate federal recognition of the Daughters of the Confederacy...for God's sake, how much more un-moderate do I need to be? You wish moderates had the guts to even agree to half of what is on this list...I never met a moderate I ever liked.
Awww... c'mon, ya like me, right?

There are a couple of things on there... Shakespeare? Definitely a leftist sentiment. The portion about the EU and the Balkans? Not necessarily left, but not right either, and definitely not fitting into the interventionalist neocon ideology. Same with leaving Haiti, Korea, and Germany (c'mon, man, you want us to stay there! Hell, you want bases EVERYWHERE!!!). The New Orleans levees? Depends on whom you want to rebuild them... If it's the state gov, you're looking right. If it's the feds, you're looking left. Nuclear power plants? Surprisingly, more left than right. The majority of the left holds that they fall under 'clean energy'. The space program? Definitely a leftist ambition, but supported by many on the right as well. The mandatory second language? Damn left. I like that one too. Keeping video games away from children? Haaaaaard left, man. We're the ones doing most of the bitching about 'video game violence' and such. Every member of Congress having been in the military? Not left, but not neocon either. In fact, we usually get snide remarks from Republicans for making that suggestion (actually, that's on of Mike Moore's main points. Yep, it's left!). Spammers & such? Hey, that's business regulation (many of them come from legitimate businesses). You can figure that one out. Compulsory music, art, and phys ed? Again, hard left. Moving the Pope here? Iffy, but if you look at the stats, Catholics actually tend to vote Democrat. There's only a couple of positions the pontiff has agreed to in the current admin. Other than that, it's all pretty much to the right. You might pop over to my site and check out my post on Extreme Moderates (it's amusing). As far as your stated positions go (ignoring parody), you'd either have to take that or be a mostly-right leaning libertarian...

Anyway, hope your Christmas was outstanding and your new year is awesome as well. Later!


Visit the veteran at http://modvavet.blogspot.com
To observe that Mr. Mountjoy occassionally shares turf held by our leftist bretheren would be the same as to suggest your boy Mark Warner could run as a Republican.
Potentially not a bad idea -- what possible turf does Warner share with Howard Dean? Turn a new leaf, Mod Vet, and power up with the True (Republican) Believers. Bring Warner with you. Poldark Maximus.
LOL Damn! Well I hope th Military gets everything on your list.
To some degree, I agree with you, PM. I think my reasoning may be slightly different, though... So correct me if you agree with what I say.
Mark Warner could fit the idealist Republican mold as a bastion of fiscal accountability. As a Democrat, he emphasizes the most sane and effective face of the party of the left, while still appealing to the honest sensibilities of the mainstream right. However, one must face the fact that the current section of the right wing in power doesn't so much comply with traditional Republican or conservative ideology. I'll refer you, for one point, to this:
It's a better explanation by far than my meager skills could forge without many hours of cramming and research. While Warner might work well as a Republican, to do so would equate him in the eyes of many with the current administration, which is to some degree born of broken liberalism. 'Tis sad, I think, as I'd be more than satisfied voting for him no matter which party he aligned himself with. As far as Howard Dean goes, he has let down his brethren to a nauseating degree. We thought we were getting a warrior; we thought we were choosing a master and commander of liberal thought, willing to challenge the hard right with steadfast resolve. Instead, we got a wimp. I would also like to clarify for you this: That I support the true right even as a Democrat, regardless of whether I agree with some of their ideology. This is what makes me a moderate. I cannot however, in good conscience, willingly support the travesty that composes the sect of the right that currently holds power... Also, I'm still by a significant degree more a liberal than a conservative on most issues. My greatest ambition is to create policies that fall in line with my slightly-left ideology but are also built to draw the support of both liberals and conservatives. To achieve true bipartisan policy is my goal, my passion, and my driving force.
Edit to that link: Use this one.


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